yellowstone

This is going to be an extension of both of my last two posts. First, more yellow 70s stuff, second, a continued rant that you may or may not want to read.

This is me last spring. I swear I look so different. The dress is a child's one from the 60s and it's really suffocating. 

I felt like walking wallpaper in 3 different yellow 70s prints on Sunday. This blurry disposable camera picture portrays a blurry version of that.

A real life moodboard of things I've bought recently and other things from my room. All the fake flowers are from the SA, so is the Peter, Mary and Paul vinyl. That was 20p. The fabric in the top right is a psychedelic dress from the 60s and the one on the left is another child's dress from the 60s. Realising right now I own too many yellow 60s dresses. The patch came in a lot I bought from Etsy.

A film picture I took in Iceland in March. The whole place looked supernatural. This particular place smelt of egg, really, really bad.

Ibe and I have done another care package swap. This is the second time and she always sends them in lovely decorated boxes (I apologise Ibe for the mediocrity of my boxes). 

 Picture from a car boot sale.

Picture from a car boot sale.

Unknown source, unknown source.

Some pages of my new journal.

Unknown source, unknown source.

Unknown source, unknown source.

Washington state feature, National Geographic, 1946.

ONWARDS WIZ ZE RANT:

I feel like I've been asking questions more than sort of, dispensing my own thoughts, so I'm going to try and be more sure of what I'm saying which might seem pretentious and contrived but it also might trick my own self into believing that I'm certain of my own beliefs.

After my last post, I received loads of tumblr messages and comments and a couple of emails and everything was really lovely and I thank all of you! It was all really positive and it's made me clearer of my own views. I've also read more stuff on the internet and I feel really good about it.

I think I've come to the conclusion that I should be doing things because I want to, and for myself. It's relatively easy for me to say this because from the age of 11 I've only really been surrounded by girls, because I go to an all girls school which has a very pushy attitude with grades so the concept that men are superior to us in the workplace etc, we were aware of, but didn't think much of, because of the 'U CAN DO ANYTHING' attitude they force into us, which also makes everyone feel like underachievers if they don't do too well so it's a double edged sword. It's only the internet that has opened me up to how sexist everything is, I can't believe I didn't notice some of it beforehand. But yeah, it's easy to say that I don't think I've ever dressed for boys/men. In a naive way, a while ago, I was shocked that it was a thing. So, the patriarchal belief that women only dress and alter their appearance for 'the male gaze' and to be objectified, just ugh. No.

In saying that I felt the requirement to be 'pretty', in my previous post, I was wondering if that made me a bad feminist for sort of wishing to adhere to conventional beauty standards, not unrealistic ones aka white girl on a magazine cover = only definition of beauty sort of thing, but just putting effort into how I look and liking how I look. I've come to also realise that feminism is about doing whatever the you want with your body. It's yours! But you shouldn't oppress others in doing what you want, too, obviously. It got me thinking about what 'ugly' means and whether 'ugly' as an insult exists. I saw this quote that I found interesting:

"there is nothing wrong with being “ugly”

it doesn’t mean anything other than not fitting a social conception of what beauty is: but yes, not all of us fall into that category

I think that is another word we have to stop running from like it is going to bite us if we associate with it, to some extent

I can be “ugly” and I can still be worthy of every respect.  I don’t need people to reassure me all the time that everyone is beautiful on the outside too- yes I know this, but yes, on some level I am a bit ugly and society is never going to change quick enough for this not to be a part of my identity and how I walk through the world.   But don’t try to use my insecurities to silence me.   Perhaps I am ugly.   Hideous.   Sure.   What can you say now?   Is that all you have?   Is that supposed to be enough to break me and kill my confidence?   Why" - feministdisney.tumblr.com

I think ugly is a word that needs to be reclaimed, again, not to be an insult. Does 'ugly' mean that you're just not being conformative to so called conventional beauty standards? This choice doesn't devalue you as a human being! Often, women are lumped into the pretty and the ugly by men and it bases worth entirely on appearance. There is beauty in personality, in creativity, in morals, in intelligence as well as appearance, and the idealistic view some men have of women is simply unrealistic, but it's the media that encourages this view (cough, photoshop, cough, girls aren't usually 3 stone heavy).

One of my favourite quotes is 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' - I think beauty is subjective. I also love the quote 'imperfection is underrated' - Helena Bonham Carter (if you are unaware of my obsession with this woman you've been living under a rock). I think crooked/stained/gappy teeth, wrinkles and frizzy hair (i could go on) - all perceived by mainstream media as things that need 'tackling' are beautiful. If women aren't allowed to age or feel like they have to slightly alter their natural state to be even considered 'presentable', something is wrong. It should be choice.

I've also come to see that having self doubt or insecurities is allowed. Everyone would be condemned if it weren't. It doesn't affect your views on equality and acceptance of every type of person, and the two aren't hypocritical of the other. Everyone has 'down days', right? The days where you feel lazy and unmotivated and you resemble a sloth (plz tell me it isn't just me). But you also have days where you feel confident and driven and motivated.

I wrote this because I think I left my last post without being sure of things, and I've been thinking and writing things down throughout the days that have passed which I've then read up on, I'm still thinking about stuff and shall continue to but this is where I'm at right now. Thank you for reading this feminist foetus' brain drovel.

Restless

This post has been a long time coming - I've had exams and it's been bugging me so much that I shouldn't really be spending my time blogging but it's all I can think about so I'm giving in. A lot has happened, I guess it became 2013 which is a big one. I also got a fringe and 4 inches cut off my hair on the 31st of December for a new year new start kind of thing.

Before the new year, I watched this two part programme called Restless and in the second part she goes to this desert-y type place and I wish I could have screencapped it all to put here. I couldn't understand most of the storyline because I'm kind of simple and had to keep asking what on earth was going on to the point where I gave up trying to figure it out and just absorbed the 70s goodness of everything. I haven't been able to shake those sort of yellow hues and muted colours from my brain and along with seeing the Chanel pre-fall I have been in aesthetic overload. 

Chanel pre-fall 2013 from style.com in all it's Harris tweed scottish wonderfullness.

Tumblr, Zanna Van Orstenborsch in Issue 15 of Lula.

Nouvelle Vague - Bullett Magazine Fall/Winter 12/13, The Virgin Suicides by Corinne Day.

No sources for any of these, sorry.

No source, The Craft.

No Source.

No Sources.

No Source.

No Sources.

No Sources.

No Sources.

Crazy for you - Best Coast.

I went to the Salvation Army this morning dressed inspired by both of these in a kilt I got from eBay for £7, a top from Etsy which was £11 and a myriad of necklaces. I bought a crystal pendant from eBay for £2.50 and put it on a chain and I'm wearing a couple others from odd places as well.

The celt symbol one is from my parents' shop, the ring I pt on a chain is from a charity shop. I think it was £1.

I wouldn't have cropped the picture on the left so much but there was some stuff on the floor and it was irritating me. Then it looked too thin so I added the two pictures at the side.

I will probably blog tomorrow as well because there is so much I want to say. I may be doing a giveaway, also.

Hollie

Room part 2 and CHRISTMAS

Happy belated Christmas all! I got my new camera(Canon 600d) and I am using it constantly it is the best and I want to eat it. I bought it with my savings from Etsy sales and some Christmas money. I also got some headphones, the Rookie yearbook, a dress from Etsy, a skirt from Etsy, a glitter phone case, the Casual Vacancy, a vintage suitcase, sweets, loads of craft stuff and everything I wanted. I didn't even write a list but my mum knows me too well.

As it's the end of the year I thought I'd be retrospective and get out all my diaries from 2012. So here they are. The green one was my first 2012 diary. It's made from my auntie's old chemistry textbook she gave to me years ago. I've never showed this one here before but I took it to Iceland with me and everyone was like wHY ARE YoU CARRYING A CHEMISTRY TEXTBOOK. It was my 2nd journal/diary ever. My first one was one I started last November but it isn't brilliant. My next one is a shrubs book I bought from the SA and turned into a journal, all the pages have pictures of flowers on so I feel bad writing in it. I started that one in May. The tartan one is probably my favourite - I use it everyday but It's nearly finished. The fortune teller one is more of a journal than a diary and it's more ongoing than the others.

I never showed you any pages from the textbook journal so here are a few. 

This is the doily in the front of my shrubs diary.

Below is what I wore on Christmas day. I will probably post a HELLUVA lot more outfit posts because these pictures took like 1 attempt each compared to 30 attempts and still not getting a decent picture. 

I got the dress for Christmas, but it's from Etsy. It has ric rac around the sleeves and on the hem and it is tiny so I have to wear my slip from the SA underneath.

You can see the pattern of the dress better here, and I have worn this necklace for roughly a week because I CANT GET IT OFF WITHOUT CUTTING IT HELP.

I also said if I saw any more cool room pictures I'd post them.

I saw this on Tumblr with no source - I think it's a room but it could be a shop.

This photoset on Rookie is one that I saw when it was put up and was amazed by it and then I forgot about it until just now when it popped into my head. I hope it's legal to post these pictures.

One of my favourite sources of bedroom inspiration is from fellow bloggers so have a look at Roma's room and Flowers' room (there are way more cool blogger peoples' rooms and but they have escaped my mind and I will link them when I remember/find them).

Hope you all had a great Christmas!

Hollie

Earth will be reborn

It's the 22nd of December! Nearly Christmas! Rejoice! Due to exams in January I won't be blogging much over the holidays but I will be back. Christmas is good because 1) Time off school 2) Food 3) Presents 4) Food 5) Tacky decorations 6) Food. These pictures below are all christmass-y and tacky and whimsical and sparkly and scary and sort of stale looking just like winter.

Also yikes Christmas trees can be beautiful. The white one below had me staring at it for a life time. ALSO at Megan's birthday party in an American diner on the 1st, they were playing the movie White Christmas and Abi and I were 'OMG ADBFQBADKSAF'-ing all the way through. That film is the basis of this post. That film embodies Christmas. That film is perfect. The following 5 screencaps of it are perfect.

EEEE it's performing and glitz and glamour and tinsel and feathers and I'm so happy it was playing in the diner.

More lovely Christmas trees that I don't have sources for.

Showgirls from Tumblr.

For the tinsel and colours. Sorry I don't have sources for these either!

70s tacky artificial Christmas trees gawky posing woman and unsuspecting cat. No sources for these either but probably home shot film pictures that just got lost in the swathes of Tumblr.

Black cat with green eyes (also my twitter name because I won't give up until I own one). I've seen so many around recently and I took a picture of one on a disposable camera that I have yet to be developed. The other day I got locked out for an hour and twenty minutes and my phone died (then miraculously turned on again then died again?) so I was stranded and left to sit in the pitch black and freezing cold on my front wall in just my school uniform and a coat with nothing to do, but a black cat came along and sat next to me so I sat stroking it and singing Beatles songs (the LOOK AT ALL THE LONELY PEOPLE aka me lyric in Eleanor Rigby was shrieked particularly loudly) for 15 minutes until I thought my feet were about to fall off with frostbite so then I hobbled to a shop to stand under a heater reading celebrity magazines for half an hour to hobble back and sit for a bit more. The Christmas tree on the right is my favourite. Again, no sources, sorry.

A granny with a silver tree and a kinderwhore girl. The granny picture is like a part 3 to the home taken pictures above and the pageant girl reminds me of those cheesy American holiday programmes and I expect her to swirl around with a huge grin and start to dance and twirl with a candy cane and kick in time with a chorus of other girls.

IN OTHER NEWS I've basically been wearing this sort of thing colours wise. My sister took these the other day. Not exactly  showing my outfit but I wore a vintage slip from the SA which was £1, a black crimplene dress from eBay for £5, a broderie anglaise collar from a haberdashery shop near me for 50p,  a cameo necklace I got for Christmas 3 years ago and an alphabet letters necklace I made myself. I made my secret Santa a 'WINONA FOREVER' one and she wore it and it was fabulous and she is a Winona fan and said I was the cutest person she knows once. All the Christmas presents I received were equally brilliant and I got glitter temporary tattoos from 2 people, a tiara and plastic beads from my secret santa, alphabet letter beads, a ton of food and sweets and black lipstick, a Hole CD and lace for my hair and people know me too too well ok. 

As well as present giving week it was also sort of 'how much can i shove in my rats nest without being excluded' week and I had ribbons, flowers and barrettes in there.

Hopefully I'll have a new camera by new year and photos won't be grainy any more but for the time being good bye and have a good Christmas (said that word too many times in this post).

May Queen

I don't have a video camera so I used my phone to do this. I also have no tripod or editing software other than movie maker so it's quite dire and I'm not sure if I'll delete it but I thought I may as well upload it for a while because it literally took FOREVER. So anyway, I made a video to Kate Nash's 'May Queen'.

Proof I'm a living, moving human:

I probably got the 'meaning' of the lyrics totally wrong, but  the definition of a may queen is a "girl or young woman chosen to be crowned in traditional celebrations of may day" so I used the tiara and the flowers to imply the 'queen' thing, and the lipstick, black ribbons in my hair, ripped fishnet tights etc to imply dat ANGST in me and the lyric that says "I'm no May Queen".

That's all 'folks', only 9 days until christmas!

Room part 1

Inventive title I know.

You may have noticed the blog name change? If not hi, the url is what the title used to be so check that out. I'm still Hollie and I'm still alive and haven't deleted my blog. I will change the url to something different soon, I'm not sure what but I will keep it for good so I'm putting thought behind it. The Odyssey and Oracle title is inspired by the album by the Zombies, except I spelt Odyssey right! I think it's appropriate because Odyssey means a 'long and eventful journey' and oracle means 'a place at which advice or prophecy was sought'. I'm not claiming to be some divine intervention of a human being but it has a mystical ring to it and this blog is basically a journey and I'm learning stuff through blogging. Meh. I give up trying to justify. Basically you guys are the oracles.

Forwards to generic blog post featuring pictures stored on my computer and starting with some pictures of my room I took over a month ago, hence the sun-ish-ness of the light:

It was my summer project, then my before October half term project, then before Christmas project, to completely re decorate my room - not in the sense of painting or rearranging furniture but just 'accessorising'. My room has always been tiny. I choose the smallest room in every house we move to. Too much space seems a little daunting, but I think I sort of am outgrowing the three metres squared space I have (or i just have far too much stuff), so it looks really really cluttered. But anyway, back to the renovation. I just seem to keep adding things and I say to myself 'oh, i'll just add this and it'll be finished and i'll pictures on my blog' because I have been saying I will to people on tumblr and instagram for ever. I think I just have to accept I'm only going to keep adding stuff.

I decided to redecorate because your teenage bedroom is where you spend most of your time, and to have to study or eat or choose what to wear in a dire, depressing place just wouldn't be any FUN. And I was bored of how it was before. I used to have the wall by my bed plastered in vogue pages and the wall opposite my bed covered in music sheets. Even before that I had a bunk bed but we got rid of that when I set my room on fire in year 5. True story. Your bedroom is meant to reflect you, as well. When people visit your house the first place they wanna see is your bedroom. It's like instant judgement, even more insightful to a person than stalking their social networks. And then was also hella envious of Andie's room in Pretty in Pink and was sort of like 'shucks, i want a room like yours'. My room still isn't as cool as hers but I reconcile myself on the fact that it is in a MOVIE and she doesn't actually have to live in it and has a props team to make it looks super radical. *"It isn't real life, it isnt real life", she repeats to herself*.

I've tried to show pictures of stuff people may not have seen before, after the movie screencaps.

I actually screen capped these myself ages ago and it took me four hours to watch the movie because i print screened and cropped as i went along. They're all in a word document and this is the first use of any of them so hooray for that. I'm a fan of clutter because my room being the size it is, it's kind of inevitable and to be ale to organise stuff to make it look decently arranged is the most self accomplishing thing in the world. The window seat shot of Andie's room is basically heaven. I have a window seat parallel with my bed and I'm trying to source lace at the moment. I have spare lace cut-off s already but they aren't quite right. I'm working on pinning lists to my walls and pictures like here because wow convenience.

These are the Virgin Suicides and the 4th is from Baz Luhrmann's adaptation of Romeo and Juliet, which we watched as a class in year 9 English. I went to Camden Market on Sunday and there was this awesome iconography stall with virgin mary drapings, metal crucifixes and all sorts of stuff. Mary-Ann went "Do you love jesus or something?" When I gasped as I saw it, then Lizzie went "Oh, are you still looking for a jesus statue? I haven't seen any yet." Because I enlisted everyone I knew a few months ago that venture into charity shops to be on the prowl for ceramic jesus statues. The candles and crucifixes in these two films illustrate this sort of eery christianity aesthetic perfectly. It can make a room look stale looking too minimalist and 'bible basher-y' but I guess when Sophia Coppola is directing your movie it's pretty safe that this isn't going to happen. Religion seems antiquated to me, but I respect anyone else's beliefs no matter how hard to grasp I find them. Religion as a whole has been controversial for, basically, ever, so it pops up in pretty much every culture going and belief is an interesting concept. It restrains the lisbon sisters so much yet it is so inherent to the entire plot, obviously, so their rooms are going to reflect the religious world they live in, despite their oppression and imprisonment by it.

This isn't a bedroom, but the window seat, like the one in Andie's room in pretty in pink is more inspiration for what I want mine to look like. Mine is more this size, too. Thank you Wes Anderson for consistent excellence.

This is Tavi's shrine, right? If so, how can a girl of 16 collect this much Hole memorabilia!!!11? it blows my mind. I am restrained to spending the pennies I find within the pocket lint in my school blazer like how did she afford it all. Shrines just further imply a sense of belonging in your room. You make it your own and fill it with the stuff you like.

This is from Tumblr. I don't have the source, but I saved it because of the pastelly clutter entwined with religious stuff too. This isn't from a film, is it?

Another shrine type thing that I saved from Tumblr. I don't have the source though. I saved a load of things like this before school started to inspire what I wanted the inside of my locker to look like. Instead of Kurt Cobain's suicide note and other writing I have my timetable stuck there. I cut up barbies for my year 9 art project and this reminds me of it, too, but this is a reference to 'Doll Parts' I guess.

Edward Scissorhands and the best mirror ever - clutter around mirrors is one of my favourite things but mine is too small. If I started to decorate it It would no long be a mirror.

This is from my saved pictures before school started also. I had a Diana picture on my locker but I glued to to a folder in the end. Princess Diana is really interesting as a part of social history. The media's infatuation and idolisation of her, from what I've heard, bordered on crazy and she was regarded by so many as a sort of celebrity type you see today, causing even bigger a frenzy than Justin Bieber. I wanted to order a heart shaped padlock from Ebay but I could only find red. What is wrong with the universe.

Things like this make a room more personal. I don't know what it's from. Somebody inform me I beg of you I do I really do.

Like a shrine but not relating to anyone in particular, although it's organised like one.

From Take it as it comes by The Vivian Girls. I thought this was from a film, but apparently not. It's the perfect amalgamation of pink and punk and early 2000s awkward fashion with a bit of the 90s, too.

This is probably my favourite picture of a bedroom. The TV reminds me of Justine Littlewood's, and then the beads everywhere and the fabric draped over the mirror and the plastered wall and lamp and ouija board you can see in the mirror are just awesome. Which awesome person does this room belong to?

Another random shrine I don't have a source for.

Another shrine. My favourite parts are the pink glasses (I have the same ones in white) and the crucifix. And the moon tarot card. And the miniature glitter ball. And the pointe shoes.

Tavi's again. The daisies and old pictures are my favourite aspects. 

There's something magical about make-up desks. They personify the maturing of a teenager when it's splayed across one's bedroom. It's even more magical when it's 60s cosmetics with a dreamy film overlay.

Is this from Moonrise Kingdom? Either way, my friend has a light bulb mirror and I'm kind of envious. However it's small and circular and a full blown feather boa deal like this blows it out of the water.

More vanity stuff, like the virgin suicides screen cap above and the make up. I have a couple of old perfume bottles from car boot sales ages ago.

This is all I can come up with at the moment, but if I see any more room pictures floating round the internet I'll instantly save them and post them. With that next post I'll post some more of my room too, because you know, there's just a few more things I have to add. Sorry I haven't been posting I really want to and should be but exam revision is haunting me.